When The God Fell Apart
by Pinkuro
Summary: When Raito is kidnapped, L goes in search for him. But will he be able to find him before the God falls to his knees? torture/rape/yaoi LxRaito - Dead Boy's Poem re-titled - TWO CHAPTERS UP!
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: yeah, still not mine T.T just anti-kira group I made that up…

Warnings: Torture, yaoi, ooc, violence, suffering –evil laugh- xD

Summary: When Raito is kidnapped, L goes in search for him. But will he be able to find him before the God falls to his knees? torture/rape LxRaito

Pairing: L and Raito

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When The God Fell Apart

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_Prologue _

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Dusk. The sun was leaving; letting the moon illuminate the place. This was happening as Raito was finally coming back to headquarters. He had spent some good couple of hours looking for L's damn candies.

He sighed. How the heck did he end up as L's maid?? He didn't even like that Ryuuzaki! Why did he have to do things for him just because that weird man was too lazy to do it for himself?

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_Flashback_

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_L was eating a cake. Raito was at his side watching him while Aizawa was talking about his new discoveries and the other investigators were listening to him._

"_And thus I think that Kira…" Aizawa spoke, but was interrupted in the middle of his thought._

"_Oh no…" L exclaimed. He looked down at his now empty plate with an air of delusion, disappointment and, perhaps sadness._

"_What is it Ryuuzaki?" Raito asked slightly annoyed, but L's sad face made him feel something inside, pity maybe? He had never seen that face L before. However, he wanted to hear Aizawa's explanation and L's chewing noises were disturbing him. That was why he was angry at L; he was disrupting Raito, not to mention the fact that he hated L to hell. _

"_My cake just ended…" L continued to watch the empty and stand-still plate. _

"_So what?" _

"_So, Raito-kun, my potential of deduction slows down forty five percent when I am without my sugar." He waited a moment and then pressed the button with a W on it to call his loyal friend Watari, ignoring Raito's upset look. "Watari, can you send me more of these delicious cakes, please?" _

"_I'm sorry Ryuuzaki," Watari's quick answer came. "The stock of sweets finished. You will have to wait until I call and the new stock gets here. However, it will be some five or more hours since the store you like is a little away from here…" the older man explained calm and slowly. _

"_Hmmm..." Now L was upset too. He couldn't work like this! He wanted sweets! He wanted sugar in his blood!! "It has a store in this town, it's not so tasty but you could…"_

"_Just to make the request will take a long time and…" _

_Raito heard all of this conversation closely. He was getting more and more annoyed. He couldn't work like this! He couldn't work at all right now, actually!! He had to do something! _

"_It would be easier just to go and get it personally, Ryuuzaki. I can't go now; I have many things to do. You know that; you send me those…"_

"_I don't want to go there; it's too far away and…" That was it! That was all Raito could take!! _

"_Okay!! Okay!! I'll GO there!!" The two guys who were discussing, just like the other investigators, whom were annoyed also, looked at Raito, the one who had just yelled. "Just stop arguing and get to work!!" He shouted finally, letting it out. He couldn't take anymore of that fight. He would get L's sweets with his own hands and then L wouldn't complain anymore; he would be happy and full of sugar!! Like always… _

_But they would be able to work again... He hoped, at least. _

_After his shouting, L and others just looked at him for some seconds, before the main detective decided to say something. "Thank you very much, Raito-kun!" He got up and grabbed Raito's hands in his. "Here, I will explain where it is and exactly what you must buy. Oh! I must give you some money also…"_

_Of course, L's explanation was not that simple and it took Raito some time to find the place… besides that, Raito's hands were hurting already with the quantity of candies L wished for… But what could he do? He had offered himself…_

_He was such a nice person…_

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_End of Flashback_

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Raito walked through the streets, searching for the building where his father, L, and the others were. He wasn't lost; he just wished he were closer than he actually was. He couldn't believe that candy shop was so far away from how it first looked like!

He sighed again. It was getting darker.

He hastened his steps.

It was just a feeling, and his feeling told him he shouldn't be in the dark tonight. It wasn't fear, he didn't have any fears. It was his instinct, and he trusted his instincts. They never let him down. They had told him to get the Death Note and to make a new world, and where he was now? He was on his way for becoming a God! To make his dream of a utopia come true!

That was just wonderful.

If only L wasn't in his way… No… L was necessary… L's death was necessary. It was necessary to show the world who's the true God of this world! The real justice! That's why L had to die!

And that put thoughts into his head.

He didn't need L. He didn't need to have offered to get the sweets for L.

Then, why had he done that?

He could have just said to call another place, someplace he thought was less tasty but faster, just for L to get his damn sugar or just wait, maybe even sent Matsuda there or some other useless worker to that stupid candy shop... The thing was, he hadn't needed to offer himself.

Then why had he done it?

Pity? He had felt something over that sad expression on Ryuuzaki's face, but it was only pity; really, a man who cries over a finished cake and no more sugar deserves pity from others. Yes… he assured himself. That must be why. Pity. Lower people deserved pity from the powerful.

He smiled to himself, calmer now that he knew the reason for his unconscious action.

He looked down at the bags in his hands as he walked; they were full of several types of candies. He didn't know how a man could eat it all at once and not get a stomachache…

He felt something covering his nose, suddenly. He couldn't breathe. It was wet and he could feel his consciousness going away soon.

A couple of hands held his arms, preventing his fugue.

His own hands let go of his bags. They fell to the floor.

His eyes were closing.

In his last view, he saw L's candies.

What was going to happen to him?

"Sleep," he heard a modified-by-machine voice whisper into his ear.

His eyes closed. He didn't know what was happening to him, but it was too fast for him to think about possibilities. He could just think of two things.

That his instinct was right was the first.

"_Ryuuzaki" _The name crossed his mind in the way. The man wasn't going to receive his candies tonight; that was the second…

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Hours passed. It was a dark night already and Raito still hadn't come back. Yes, they were getting worried, and perhaps a certain detective was getting low sugar in his blood.

"Raito is taking too long," the Yagami father thought out loud. He was the most worried of the group.

"Maybe he got lost?" Matsuda tried to say something to calm them.

"He wouldn't get lost; he knows this city very well. He was born in here and my explanations were very good. I'm sure he found it." L was worried too. He wanted his sweets but Raito couldn't disappear either. Maybe Matsuda was right? Maybe he just got lost?

"Watari, have you found Raito-kun by his GPS yet?" L asked pressing the button to talk to his friend. He already had asked him to track Raito when Souichiro started to get worried. At the time he just wanted to assure him his son was close, calling him, but when Raito didn't answer, they started to get really worried and then started to track him by the GPS on his cell phone.

"No, sorry Ryuuzaki…" Watari was worried too. He felt like it was his fault. He could have asked for more candies sooner. He should have seen they were finishing, that was his job anyway. Well, part of it. If anything happened to that boy… mass murderer of not… not only him, but he knew L felt the same way. He knew L acted like a stone, but inside he was just made of glass.

He looked at the screen. Using the vigilance camera of the exit of their building he had listened to a very fast car in full speed leaving there. At the screen, a couple of bags had just been thrown from the car he hadn't seen. He looked at those bags; he knew that logo. "Wait… Ryuuzaki…" In a second he started working with the cameras, hoping for a better view of the car that had thrown these bags.

"What is it, Watari? Did you found something?" L asked, hoping he did, but in this moment he heard something. It was a cell phone ringing? He looked around. It was Souichiro's phone. The man must have turned it on when he started to get worried about his son, probably thinking that his son might call him or something of the sort.

L looked at everybody with a glare for them to be silence. They understood and kept just looking at the father.

The Yagami family's father was nervous; He looked at the phone. "Unknown number" could be read. L started to suspect more as he told him that, and Souichiro finally placed it by his ear, but in some place where everyone else could also hear.

"Hello," he said only. He should be able to hear the voice from the phone first before speaking anything. Who could it be? If it was his family or some friend it wouldn't say unknown number… neither would it be with a public phone, so, who could it be? He could feel his heart beating fast.

"Hello Yagami-san." It came from the other side; everyone soon noticed it had been modified by a machine. "We're with your son. Don't worry." Souichiro's eyes widened in surprise. _"No… Raito…"_ "No wait… you should get worried…"The other side laughed "I know L is there with you, so I only have a note for you. We know Yagami Raito is Kira. We are going to do what you didn't have the courage to do. We are going to make justice for the world."

L's eyes widened this time. How...? How did somebody know this? How had anybody gotten this information? He wanted to ask this, but the father shouted first.

"What are you talking about?? My son is _not_ Kira!! He's innocent! What are you going to do with-," he yelled angry and nervous.

"Hahah okay… You will see the truth soon…" the voice said. "Bye L. See you…" And it turned off.

Everyone choked. L didn't know what do. He knew if anything happened to Raito, it was going to be his fault… his only fault…

At the other side, Watari was getting the bags at the exit. Inside of one of them, lay Raito's cell phone. Totally destroyed. "Oh No…"

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Raito opened his eyes. It was dark, but he could feel something squeezing his neck, wrists and ankles, something cold and heavy.

His head felt weird too. _"Did somebody drug me?"_ he thought as soon as he tried to get up, with some difficulties.

He could hear chains. He tried to walk but something deterred him, held him. He tried to figure out what it was. Groping, he soon discovered it.

The young man started to be afraid_. "What is happening? Where am I?"_ he thought as he figured it out. The chains were connecting him to the wall; they were connected to these cold things in his neck, wrists and ankles. He figured they were metal. And they were something from somebody who did not want him to get out from here.

He heard a crinkling noise. He turned around. Light hurt his eyes; light that soon went out. The chestnut boy covered his eyes with his hands, making noise his chains.

"Hello Kira. I see you are finally awake." A voice clearly modified by a machine, like L in the first time he heard about him in TV, when the detective had defied him, spoke.

He tried to look to see the owner of the voice; his eyes still hurt, sensitive, probably a drug effect.

It was a man. The muscled body spoke to him. He couldn't know who it was, though, because the man wore a balaclava; a ski mask, like a toque, but covering the whole face. The eyes were shaded with some big dark sunglass too, of the type which reflected the environment, making it impossible to see his eyes. Raito couldn't see anything of the man's face.

But the worst thing was that, in his mind, he had already thought of why this man had done this, why he had imprisoned him like this…

The question now was how.

"So, let's start your punishment, Kira…"

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_To be Continued… _

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**Pinku**: yeaah this is the new version of the old one since the administrator removed it so I have to change the things I think they were the reason it was removed…

You knoow… about the group who kidnapped Raito… I made them up… they are not real… maybe there is an something like they out there… but not like mine… mine are like terrorists, they united themselves to destroy Kira… so they can't be real… because to be real… Kira would have to real… and Kira is not real… so anti-kira group are not too, and I created them… so they are mine, I own their typed and inexistent souls, got it? ;)

Anyway did you like? –glowing eyes- huh? –puppy dog face- review pwease? Lot of them please? Please? Please? 8D

Nice ones please \o\

8DD


	2. First

Disclaimer not. mine. yet. T.T again… just anti-kira group I made up…

Warnings: Torture, yaoi, ooc, violence, suffering –evil laugh- xD

Summary: When Raito is kidnapped, L goes in search for him. But will he be able to find him before the God falls to his knees? torture/rape LxRaito

Pairing: L and Raito

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When The God Fell Apart 

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_Chapter First _

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"So, let's start your punishment, Kira…" Raito froze. Punishment? What the hell was he talking about?! And why had the man called Raito Kira? How did he know this? Was this man crazy? Well if he was… Raito could see this man had planned every detail, looking at what he was and for the man… He had to think about a plan about how to run away now, and it wouldn't be easy from what it looked like. "I wanted to do it with you still lying down, more drugged, but… I think the effect of the morphine I gave you earlier is still in you, isn't it? Your head must be feeling horrible…"

He was right. Raito's head was nothing good for sure. He couldn't balance himself or focus properly on the man in front of him.

The chestnut gulped. What did the man mean by the word "punishment?"

"Well let's begin then!" the man said with an evil tone, coming closer, running, and kicking Raito's chest. Raito noticed his reflexes were slower too, probably because of the drug they had given him before.

He moaned, twitching in pain.

"How weak... I thought Kira was stronger…" He heard a voice, a modified one again. But this one was different from the previous one. Raito looked up. Another man had gotten there.

"I know. But that doesn't matter. He deserves to suffer for what he did." Raito looked at the second man who held a couple of staves. He didn't know if it was made of wood or metal or whatever, but he watched as the man handled the first one. "He deserves it, strong or not."

"Yes, I know." And with that, they got closer to him.

It had been fast. The young chestnut was still curled up and holding his stomach, trying to make the pain to go away. He didn't even have time to defend himself from the first strike on his head.

Raito screamed.

Blood started to come running down his face as more pain invaded his body, this time from his head. The place they had just hurt him. The two of them had hit him on that place; one before the other.

Numb, he fell to the floor, barely conscious. His vision started to blur, more after that. They were strong, he could tell. However, he was probably feeling this bad because of the drug they had given him earlier.

Whoever these "they" were. Because, Raito knew very well that he had no idea where he was or who had done this to him. He had a couple of theories. They had done this because he was Kira; how they knew he was Kira he didn't know, did they steal L's archives? He didn't believe this one. Ryuuzaki could be anyone, but he knew how to keep a secret very well, and Raito knew L wouldn't let this sort of thing out for anybody steal. Would he? Whether he would or not, this explanation fit.

Another one was that they didn't know anything, and just kidnapped him for money. That didn't explain the nickname, but with the drug Raito could just not be listening very well.

Yet another one was that this whole thing was a plan from L to make Raito assume he was Kira. But, could Ryuuzaki really fall to something so low like this?

He watched, with a pulsing pain, how the two mysterious men walked closer to him.

"You know, Kira… You will learn the first step of justice now…" the first one said, or was it the second one?

One of the men hit him with the stave again, making Raito hit the wall with his head and back. The young man could feel it clearly, cold, just like these things he was chained with, which attached him to the wall. That meant that this wall was made of metal… That made him think… How could he feel the temperature and the texture of it so well? It was as if… as if… as if he was naked! Was he naked?

He passed his hands over his body. His chest, his stomach, he could feel bruises on them. He passed his hand on the opposite arm. He could feel several stings, from places where syringes had been inserted, on his arm.

His sight fell from his arm. The light of a small window on his back, a small light that said it was day or night that he couldn't see anymore because he was so weak and numb, and drugged, and another light by, what also should be, a metal door didn't do much for him. It just gave a darker façade to his two kidnappers, if, they were only these two. And Raito felt it was not.

"So did you finally notice we took your clothes off?"

"We had to do it; we couldn't have done the work we wanted to with something so evil like you with you dressed up. You had to be fully in your dirty skin."

"For me you had to die… But well… It's not my call…" Raito heard a chuckle.

"Well let's work now!"

Raito screamed as the two of them hit him, fast, at the same time, making him go against the wall, repeating the action several times.

He fell to his chest at the floor, his arms supporting his already weakened body.

"Cuh! Cuh!" He moaned as he coughed out blood.

"Oh! Kira's hurt!"

"He thinks so, anyway!"

"Yeah, I know, he's still too dirty!!"

The man ran and with all his strength, he kicked Raito back to the wall, making Raito's blood fly from his mouth into the air; it hadn't even given him time to scream. Too fast. Too sudden.

He hit the wall with full strength.

Raito supported himself on the wall as he felt like a hole had just been opened in his chest, and for a free gift it had taken away his lungs and air too.

He gasped.

He couldn't breathe!

His head was falling to his side; he couldn't support his body any longer.

He was going to pass out.

"Looks like Kira's going to faint"

"I see… But you know… We can't let him try to run away when he wakes up…" What was he talking about? Were they going to give more drugs to him or something? He knew he could surpass it in someway and run away.

"Yeah… But drugs aren't enough… It has to be something that impedes him from _walking_ away…"

They smirked underneath their masks as they walked closer to Raito.

One of them grabbed Raito's right leg and started to cuddle it gently, or at least it looked like it. The chestnut was already too weak to try to walk away.

"Say goodbye to your leg, boy." The one who wasn't touching his leg spoke.

Suddenly he felt a motion from the man's hand.

Scream.

His leg was now broken.

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It had been already 3 days since Raito's disappearance. Everybody was worried, looking for him.

The Kira case was practically closed for now.

L felt guilty. Was it really his fault? Had they stolen his information?

He tried not to worry or show it too much, just to find his main suspect, and his first friend.

"Did you find anything yet L?" The worried father pleaded.

"No. Nothing," L answered, still working continuously.

He was going to find him. Cost what it may. If it was really his fault, he was going to find him.

He had to.

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_To Be Continued… _

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**Pinku:** I'm not in the mood to write new things and I can't take the risk to let the olds… so…. Liked? Review me please!


	3. Second

Disclaimer: not mine. yet... (evil grin) but the anti-kira group is (evil laugh)

Warnings: Torture, yaoi, ooc, violence, suffering (evil laugh)

Summary When Raito is kidnapped, L goes in search for him. But will he be able to find him before the God falls to his knees? torture/rape LxRaito

Pairing: L and Raito

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When The God Fell Apart 

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_Chapter __Second _

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One movement; that was all he needed to send his knee cap to the right. Totally dislocated.

But that was not all. In this moment his friend came and trod over Raito's right foot.

This trampling had been fast and painful. The guy did it with all his strength. The man wanted to break Raito's foot. It was his plan, and he did it. Raito's foot was broken.

Raito yelped in pain.

After breaking the foot, this one man, who had done this, got Raito's leg with his hands. The other laughed.

Raito looked at the men, but not really focusing; with his eyes half closed he could barely see something. He didn't know what else to think. He was tired and his whole body hurt. He just wanted to sleep.

Perhaps this was all a bad dream?

After looking at Raito's right leg, with his ninety degree dislocation, the one who held his leg looked at the foot, also ninety degrees out of the joint.

And then, it was just one movement, again.

With his hand he just slapped the young man's foot about sixty degrees, and counting which was already out of the joint, now it was hardly connected to its opposite side.

Raito screamed, but not for too long.

He blacked out.

"Finally!!"

"Now he won't escape us."

"Yes. Kira will be with us for a long time now…"

He let the leg fall to the floor, just before they walked out the room.

And Raito was left with his nightmares.

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"Watari, did you find anything about that car that my candy was thrown from?" L asked. He felt lost. It was over a week already and Raito was still missing. They had been searching for the whole time; L and Soichiro more than all the others. The father practically didn't sleep. L practically never ate.

"I found the car, but it didn't have any documents and now it's crushed, totally destroyed. It was on its way to being disassembled on a dismantler, but I can stop it for some time. Soon I will go analyze it and see any clues it might get to us. I'll take a picture for you too, Ryuuzaki," the old man finished his sentence. L thought about it, it was almost nothing, but still, it was more than they had right now.

"Excellent. Keep on it," Yes. Watari was really the best, only he could get a card of a car he hadn't even seen and yet find it. Okay, maybe L could too, but Watari had been his teacher. The man was always calm when everything seemed to be falling down. "Thanks, Watari." L turned the communication off. They had work to do.

And L had some suspects already for who had kidnapped Raito; looking from the message the kidnappers had sent, which Ryuuzaki was still tracking, they knew exactly what and who they wanted. And that was Kira.

That eliminated a couple of alternatives already, like kidnapping for money and created another couple of ones which really mattered.

The problem was, these "another couple of ones" were worse.

The first theory was that, some kind of anti-Kira group, with an excellent hacker, or just people who hated him and united themselves, kidnapped Raito, with the intentions to, probably, kill or punish him for his crimes. Perhaps even their own research took them to the greatest detective's main suspect, thus it would not be L's fault, so much …

The second one said it was the government. There were a lot of countries wishing for Kira's head. They had the money, the power to do that, and the black haired one knew some countries had a violent police. It wouldn't be such a surprise if they had kidnapped him.

The third and last was the worst of the theories. It was about the government paying a group who was against Kira's politics to find and eliminate the mass murderer. It scared L. It was the worst, because if a group failed, they could pay another one to do the job.

He had to find Raito, fast.

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Days passed. Raito didn't really know how much time had gone by. He only knew about his leg.

His broken leg.

They hadn't really looked at nor helped him with anything about the leg. They had just let it stay broken, hurt and painful. Raito figured that was exactly what they wanted.

He had tried to fix it, place the bones in their right places and shape, but all he could do was cause more and more pain to himself.

He couldn't walk anymore, not with this leg.

Now, if he couldn't escape, there was only one way Raito could think of to get out from that hell. If they really were sure he was Kira, he had to convince them the opposite, that he was innocent. To act like the hurt and wronged boy he actually was. He didn't need to be the excellent actor he was for that. That was the truth; it was injustice what they were doing to him. The world needed him.

Sure he was starting to disbelieve that… maybe if he said sorry everything would be better? No… Sorry would only piss them off more… he had to convince them he was innocent… Sure, it was not a perfect plan, but it was all he had thus far. Maybe with time he would be able to think of a better one, because he did notice he was that thinking more clearly recently. Today he was thinking things yesterday, or hours ago, he could not, because, although his brain was still very numb from the drug and that impeded him from deducing stuff he normally would, he could think better, and that was good. It meant the drug effect was going down. He could sense that, not just from his thoughts, but from a bad side, from his leg. It was starting to hurt really badly, a lot worse. If they actually wanted him to feel pain, and that probably was so, it was working.

And if the faded pain was starting to get worse, then Raito figured it was better to not move his leg. He would let it stay down in the same place, not just to not hurt, but also to help his body to heal for itself. If they would not help him, he would do everything possible to help himself. And the faster the better.

However… came the thought, he was really recovering his intellect previously lost by the morphine; this thought was a proof… if they weren't appearing to him because they wanted to make him fell pain, then, when it went away they would come back, with high chances, to drug him again, or something worse.

Or perhaps they were taking advantage of this middle time to plan something, and to prepare it.

But what would it be?

One way or another, it would not be good, Raito would have to make his way out soon…

But how would he do it?

If nobody came in, then how would he convince anybody? Maybe that was another reason to them to not get in, not speak to him. Because the times he saw some human body were when "a hand" opened a small part below the metal door, that now was locked; Raito had checked. "It" handed him a plastic cup with dirty water; not always, just sometimes. Raito thought it was once a day, once every two days, or something. The water was awful, but he drank it all. He couldn't die there and he was so thirsty. The only time "it" handed him something to eat had been what he guessed days ago. They had sent him the usual plastic cup of dirty water with rotted bread, no plate, just on the floor.

He ate it with joy.

He was starving.

…As he was now.

How many days hadn't he eaten?

He had lost several pounds already. He could feel his rib and waist bones already. He cheeks had gotten thinner too. As also were his arms, legs and every other part of his body. It was easier to notice that when you were naked twenty four hours a day. It was also easier to feel cold. God, he was freezing. That floor and that wall were already cold, but it had something on that place that made it worse…

And it had not helped that it was dark, and had no beds, cushions, sheets or anything to help warm him up.

Just a cold floor with a cold wall.

…In that cold and freezing place, called Earth.

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_To be Continued… _

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**Pinku****: **another chapter… hope you liked \o\ review me if you did n.n


	4. Third

Disclaimer: just anti kira group is mine… don't sue me….

Warnings: Torture, yaoi, ooc, violence, suffering (evil laugh)

Summary: When Raito is kidnapped, L goes in search for him. But will he be able to find him before the God falls to his knees? torture/rape LxRaito

Pairing: L and Raito

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When The God Fell Apart 

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_Chapter Third _

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Raito couldn't sleep, perhaps because of the pain in his leg, perhaps because of the freezing cold he was feeling. He tried to curl himself into a ball in that cold, metal floor, attempting to warm himself, but that did nothing for him, beside making his leg hurt even more.

It was dark, he hadn't seen some light in weeks, and he was starving. He wanted to eat. _"Anything, please…"_

These sick people… doing these things to a God… it was because of people like them that Kira existed. To clean the world, making it a better one for the good people, people like… like….

Who were the good people Kira fought for?

Maybe it was the hunger, maybe it was the pain, but it had been sometime, days, weeks, maybe, since Raito was confused and didn't know for who his mission was. His duty, it was for somebody, right? But who?... before he was sure he could see… but now… everybody he could remember were neither criminals, rapists, or simply evil, bad, selfish, jealous, perverted, lying, angry, or something like that…

He didn't know who deserved to live anymore...

The chestnut-haired man tried to assure himself that this was all because of this mental torture; they were playing with his mind, they wanted him to change his opinion about everything in life… he couldn't let them win… whatever they wanted to win…

"Hello Kira…." A bright light came to his view, and for some moments Raito couldn't see. His eyes were not familiar with light after so long; he would have to wait sometime to them to adjust to the light coming from the open door. He closed them immediately. "Sorry? Too bright for you? Don't worry I was going to close it anyway, we don't want you to escape, do we?" The man laughed a little, finding something Raito didn't know about funny.

"Why are you calling me Kira?" He tried once, to see what kind of answer he would get, he thought it was better this way, than the obvious 'I'm not Kira' he used with L. As these men were crazy, and for some reason they were sure he was Kira, they probably would take that as a joke.

"Why? What are you implying? That you are innocent? That you're not that horrible killer everyone is hearing about these days?"The man made a pause before talking really slow in Raito's ear. "Are you saying that you don't deserve to die… here?" The man's words were slow and calculated, with the tone of a sociopath of some sort. This, alone, made Raito sure that his technique would not work, not with these maniacal men.

The chestnut didn't answer immediately; he was shocked and had no more ideas on how to escape. He felt hopeless… but he didn't want to die right now! He didn't want to….

"Huh? Answer me!!" The man yelled, punching the younger one's face. Raito's head turned to the side of the punch and his already disheveled and messed hair went with him, messing more and covering his eye.

"I don't…" He whispered, finding difficult to talk louder "I don't want to die…."

The chocolate eyed one looked at the male dressed in black, with crystallized eyes. He did not want to cry. He refused to. In all his life that he could remember, he had never let single a tear out; he didn't want to do it now. He didn't want to show weakness to these guys. He wanted to show that he was stronger and that he would survive to their tests.

Crying would be the last drop. It would mean he was losing.

It would be admitting he was losing and giving up.

He would never give up.

The one with sunglasses looked down to Raito. Since the last thing the kidnapped one had said, moments ago, the man had been looking at Raito, thinking, with this mock look. The son of Yagami knew that what he had just said was humiliating, but this whole thing he was going through was humiliating. He was just so tired, physically, and mentally. He was just so….

He didn't know what to do anymore…. He couldn't think…. He couldn't do anything…

He knew this was their game, but what could he do against it? They were the Game Masters. They controlled this world and its characters. They controlled him.

He was probably so mentally tired, that he couldn't think. If he was in his one-hundred percent he would be able to. He always did.

That's right. He just had to rest, meditate, and calm down. He could think of a way out of this.

He was a genius after all.

He was Kira.

Sure that, the fact that he was Kira, led him to this situation… But he didn't want to think about it. He knew there would be crazy people around the world, against him; he just had to… overcome… like he always did….

Kira….

It was his entire fault, after all….

"So, you don't want to die?" The man finally spoke something; Raito, who had turned his head down, looked up again, to face the man, trying to keep an emotionless expression. He couldn't see the man's face or expression through that skull-mask. But Raito could feel the man's tone; it was different. He was going to do something, and Raito would not like that.

He walked one step closer to Raito, walking directly over Raito's injured leg, but the man did not only do that. He trampled the boy like he was killing a cockroach under his foot.

It hurt so much.

Raito felt like there was suddenly no air in the room anymore.

He couldn't breathe. His leg… dear god… his leg… this pain… he had never felt anything like this before. He wished to feel nothing like it again. However, he feared it would not be like that. It would be worse.

"I will grant you your wish. Don't worry. You won't die, at least not right now." The man spoke with a cold and slow voice. "But you can be sure. After what you will be going through, you will feel very sorry to have made that choice."

Raito gulped.

That was what he feared.

"Now prepare. You next punishment is going to start… Now..."

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What was happening here? How could someone be so good at hiding tracks? No… L could not give up. He had to find him. He had to find Raito, alive.

This message was the only clue they had about the kidnappers. L was trying to were the message came from. The others were trying to find the owner of the voice, and take out the modified tone.

Watari was trying to get information of every person connected to Raito or L that could know about Kira and steal L's data bases.

The older man had offered to do tracking, but L said no; he wanted to do that, he knew he was better than the gray haired man for these things. He knew it would be hard.

He just didn't know it would be hard.

'This hard' just meant how they had to hurry.

Whoever did this to Raito was prepared.

And the young man was in danger, great danger.

…And all because of L…

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_To Be Continued... _

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**Pinku:** liked? Not? review me… tell me what you think… make me happy…


	5. Fourth

Disclaimer: You still think it's mine? Reallly?? Good joke but you know just the evil anti-kira group is mine…

Warnings: Torture, yaoi, ooc, violence, suffering (evil laugh, yeah still muahahahahah!!) and now Rape!! Be warned!! Muahahahah!!

Summary When Raito is kidnapped, L goes in search for him. But will he be able to find him before the God falls to his knees? torture/rape LxRaito

Pairing: L and Raito

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_Chapter Fourth _

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"Now... We're going to prepare you for a task. Understood?" The man said calmly and coldly.

Raito tried to process what the man had just said, but, just… he feared to think. He didn't want to admit, but he feared to think about these things. What did the man mean in all that? Prepare for a task? Tell people all over the world? This was insane! This man… these men were insane!!

"Now!" He The man punched Raito into the wall. It had been so fast he didn't see it coming. Kira was also weak because of the lack of food and water, so his reflexes were slow. Plus, with only his naked skin, it hurt much more when he was punched. Raito was probably anemic already. How long had it been since he had first come here? He didn't know, but it was probably enough for his skin to weaker and thinner because of the lack of protein and energy.

"_So... they have been not feeding me properly to prepare me for this '_task'_? To get me weaker and weaker?" _He concluded this in his mind. It made sense because, if it was true, then this 'task' was also the reason they had not been numbing his mind with morphine. They didn't need to. Probably didn't want to. Probably, for this "task", or to be prepared for it, he needed to be fully conscious…

The question was… what exactly was this task? Raito had some theories of course, but he didn't think he was right about any of them. These people had shown to be very unpredictable, and that was the only thing he knew that he was right about.

He just… He didn't like the idea of this task. He was sure he wouldn't like it. That was another thing he knew about this task. Because, if he needed to be weakened, naked, and wounded, just to be prepared for it… he was not willing to think about what the task itself was.

Actually, he just didn't want to admit it. It wasn't dislike. It was simple and sorrowful fear.

But he knew that fear, not only made people weaker, but also eroded one's soul and controlled one's mind if one didn't control it.

He wasn't willing to feel fear. He would face it, and he would survive, whatever the challenge was.

Death was not a choice to him.

"You look tired. Have you been eating properly?" The man asked sarcastically. It was a joke that Raito didn't laugh at. The chestnut haired one knew that, he that must already be thin as hell, pale as the full moon, with his hair dry, dirty and messed; he could feel his skin, dry, building up on his fingers.

Another thing was that, because of the ventilation system was seldom inexistent of this dark room that he was in, fresh air was very rare. He couldn't breathe properly, and without oxygen in his brain, his thoughts couldn't be at one-hundred-percent, his whole body got weaker, and his lungs fought more and more for air each time; he could feel it. His breathing was heavy. He couldn't breathe.

Was this what somebody with asthma felt?

Raito didn't reply to the man's question about eating. He didn't want to, and figured the question was not meant to be answered. He just observed how the man walked, circling him, looking at him. Raito couldn't tell what the man was thinking, or feeling really; the skull-mask and sunglasses made it harder, almost impossible, because he couldn't see the expression on his face.

"Well… I saw what I needed to for your punishment…. I've analyzed you completely already…" The kidnapper said, stopping in front of the naked boy. "…Now we can begin with your preparation."

Raito watched as the man slowly unzipped his pants with one hand while still looking at him. "You know, Kira…." The younger looked up, distracted from looking at his pants. "…I was the man you first met here. I was the man who always came to talk and punish you and the one who always fed you. I did all that to watch you. How you acted, how you behaved, how your composure was… what you were feeling, how you were taking this… And I shall tell you that… All my previous thoughts of you were right…. You are a disgusting kind of person…" The chestnut noticed the hatred in his words. Everything that the man was saying the man believed, the kidnapped boy could be sure.

Raito gulped. His eyes turned down and he finally realized what the man meant with "preparation" and he was right. He was unpredictable and he didn't like it.

It was one of the first times he didn't get happy from being right.

"Can you see this you bastard? This is the only part of me you will ever see! Remember that forever!!"

When the man kicked him again, it wasn't just any kick. It was a sideways kick, which hit him at his side, in his hips, not in his stomach, and for that reason, he fell to his side with his face down, only his back facing the one who kicked him.

"Gaaaaahhh!" he screamed, but not out of the pain of the kick, it was out of another sort of pain...

...The pain of humiliation.

He could feel it. He could feel it... That man's dick was inside of him, and he did it, fast and painful. The man wanted to hurt him and would do whatever he wanted to reach his goal.

Raito's already heavy breath got heavier, but he wouldn't let himself admit his weakness again. Not again. Not anymore.

"So? What do you feel? Do you like it?" He took his member out of the boy. "That's what you deserve. Killing people merciless. Playing God was you are… do you really think you are a God? Do you feel like you are the King of people, from just killing people as you have been? Really?" The voice modified of the muscled man was heard in his ear.

"AAAH!!" Raito screamed. He felt the man invading his body again; he did it followed several times more. Raito didn't dare scream anymore. Even with this painful feeling, even with the sensation of blood coming out of him already. He would not show anymore weakness to him.

The man was kneeled right above the young man. All his weight over him, it made it all hurt more, but what was worse was that one of the man's legs was on Raito's broken leg. He tried not to scream from it, to focus on another thing… but he only had two choices… his leg, or the man inside of him, eating his body from the inside like a parasite.

"…and then you came here…" He continued, inside of him "…with this expression of a person who was suffering the most in the entire world. An innocent person who didn't deserve this injustice… but still acted as a God…." He went out, in, and out again, and pressed Raito's head to the floor, facing down. The boy moaned a little, from pain. "…And what about the people you killed? The beloved ones of them who are suffering, the ones you made suffer?? Don't you think about them?? They suffered much more than you!" He screamed in rage.

Kira had been thinking about his actions since he had gotten here… but… but…. No… he couldn't let the man enter his mind! That was what he wanted! He had to stay firm in his beliefs… For some reason it was getting harder and harder.

"…Do you know…? There are three kinds of people in this world: One is the kind who should suffer, people like you and your followers, sick psychopaths who only care about themselves. In second, there are the people who don't care about you; they lived their lives, never really caring about you, or your ideals, and when you came, they just wished you to disappear, but still not doing anything to make a difference... And for the third kind… there are people like me… people who…" He got inside and out of him again, continueously, "…Actually don't want sick bastards like you, killing people, and acting as Gods!! Like you were king of us, like those ridiculous figures of the past…" With two hands he grabbed Raito's head and hit his forehead onto the floor, the boy was in a defenseless position and very weak, he could do nothing for himself but to try to prevent these words from getting into his mind… But it was getting harder…. "…But yeah that is how you are… You act as if you can control our lives, and worse, our deaths! But you know what? We don't need you to be here!! You are not a God! And the only king you are is the King of Nothing!!"

Raito was tired. His whole body hurt as he felt the man getting faster and faster. He felt blood on his legs, between his legs, on his forehead… His entire body hurt…

The chestnut haired didn't want to admit it but he felt weak. He couldn't resist the man. At the beginning he tried, but he couldn't anymore, these chains that attached him to the wall, the lack of food, the lack of water. This prison… the whole kidnapping… his worlds… was the man right? Was Raito really that pathetic? Maybe the man was correct and Kira was just a bunch of crap… not just because "Kira" got him into this situation, but also, maybe because the people really didn't need him… maybe people were like the man said… maybe they were just too screwed up and any help wouldn't do anything for them.

Maybe people would never change, no matter how hard he tried…

"What is this?" Raito felt the man's gloved hand over his cheek, like it was feeling something, something the younger man didn't notice; something wet… something…. "Are these tears? Are you crying… Kira?" The man laughed, but he was right. Raito was crying. Since when had he been crying? "Are you sad?" The question sounded mocking.

The bruised boy didn't answer; it was another of those questions that he wasn't asking to get a reply. He guessed he never asked to get a reply, but it was okay. He wouldn't probably answer it anyway…

After what seemed hours and hours it only got worse. Raito couldn't breathe anymore, he was choked by his tears and made it harder to get air, his whole body bled and hurt, mainly his legs, but it was okay… if only he didn't die… he swore to himself he would survive and would overcome this… he was not sure if it was worth anymore… but a small feeling was not letting him be willing to die… yet…

"I guess you're done with the preparation now…" He got up, pulling himself all out from Raito's hurt body, who felt a sharp pain in the area of his legs, and because of it, he moaned, not wanting to scream.

The chocolate eyed one looked up as the man zipped up his pants; the boy was lying at on the floor, wet tears shining on his face and blood glistening on the rest of his body.

"Hmf." The man smirked and kneeled before him, grabbing the hurt young man's chin with his hand. "Now. We want something from you, a task, as I said it before. I will tell you a summary of what your task is..." The masked man stared at him with his hidden eyes, the lying boy looked at him, as he started to speak slowly and whispering. "...The world needs to know who exactly Kira is, from Kira's own voice, to be able to do something, instead of just wish…. You do understand what am I talking about, right?" He spoke in his ear. "Are you willing to collaborate?" He asked to him, serious.

Raito was tired, he was weak, hurt, bruised and scared…. He didn't want to admit the last part but it was true. It was better if he admitted it to himself…. Then, slowly he would be able to control himself. That was what he was trying to do, but for some reason, his entire body wasn't obeying him! It was trembling from head to toe…. Did the man… this man… _these men _scare him?

Trembling, he shook his head. He didn't really understand what the man said; he was so weak that his head wasn't working anymore. He just wanted to close his eyes and sleep, for almost forever and ever…

"Oh, really?" The man smirked. "I imagined you would say that. Even with the preparation… but that needed to be done, I guess it was only half way done already …." Raito watched as the man's hand went to the pockets of his pants to get something "…Now, it only needs a final act, to you to get all complete…"

The Brunette's eyes widened. What would the man do? He could see perfectly; he could see a kitchen knife in his hands.

"Close your eyes. This is going to hurt," he warned. But it was more of a mocking, because, before Raito could do anything, he went with the knife to the younger one's face.

All Raito could do was scream. He screamed with the rest of his voice, and strength that he had.

"So, are you willing to collaborate?" he asked once more.

Raito nodded his head.

"Good boy…" he smirked.

Victory.

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_To be Continued… _

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**Pinku: **another chapter… hoped you had enjoyed… way or not… make an another happy with a nice review….


	6. Fifth

Disclaimer: Don't waste your time… Death Note is not mine, just the anti-kira group…

Warnings: Torture, yaoi, ooc, violence, suffering (evil laugh, yeah still muahahahahah!!)

Summary When Raito is kidnapped, L goes in search for him. But will he be able to find him before the God falls to his knees? torture/rape LxRaito

Pairing: L and Raito

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When The God Fell Apart 

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_Chapter__ Fifth _

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They have been working hard. For weeks they have been trying to find the missing boy, though they did not progress much. Everyone was sick, worried, and, with days and days of seldom results, starting to get pessimists.

"What are we doing wrong?" Matsuda complained. "Why do I feel like we haven't been moving anywhere in this investigation?"

"It's how we all feel Matsuda…" Aizawa tried to comfort Matsuda, but he actually felt as disheartened as his friend. Matsuda sighed.

"Stop complaining! It is not your son that is the kidnapped one!!" Soichiro, the father, cried in agony. Everyone else lowered their heads in sorrow. They knew what he was feeling. If Aizawa lost his child, he wasn't sure he would be able take it.

"Sorry boss I just…" Matsuda tried to explain; he also understood what the Yagami father was feeling.

"Silence! I'm trying to think here!!" They heard a scream, and noticed it was from nothing more and nothing less than L. He was curled up in his chair, more than usual, biting his thumb and, staring at the computer screen, he looked very focused to everybody at the room. And Ryuuzaki really was. The problem was, it wasn't taking him anywhere. The investigation of the missing young man suspected as kira had stopped.

"Sorry." Everyone apologized, but no one got an answer; L just stood there, in the same way, same look, same focus.

After a while, they decided to go back to their duties and forgot about L and his frozen position.

The detective didn't understand how something, someone, _some people_, could be this… they had to had make a mistake at some point, a hole so L could see through… any of it….

They had to be missing something… nobody could have left no clues….

"_Raito-kun, what am I missing?" _

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He had felt the knife slice through his face. He had felt the taste of metal on his tongue, crossing his skin; the blood saucing the instrument as he was divided into pieces. And even after a day, he was still bleeding, harshly. His left cheek was cut in half; it went from the point of his lip until one finger before the edges of the eye. In the middle of the line, it divided into two, each one going to an extremity of the eye.

At the moment, this cut had a couple of, not well made at all, stitches that didn't stop the bleeding or the pain; actually, it made it worse.

But surely, the pain and the bleed had others motives also.

He was being circled by many men. Every single one dressed as the one who had cut his face. There were men at the door, outside the building and inside, where the chocolate-haired was; they were all there for watching what was happening today.

The young man was sitting in a small chair and in front of him he also had a small table; both table and chair next to the wall, where he was chained. Over the table, there was a laptop and a man operating it, preparing it for something. This man was who the jailed boy thought must be the hacker of the group.

The chestnut wasn't really feeling well, in mind or body. He was still feeling the horrible effects of the previous day. He wanted to puke, he wanted to faint… he wanted to… to….

He didn't know what he wanted anymore….

"Ready. You will do your task in 3… 2... 1…" The hacker pointed to the microphone over the table and next to the laptop and just before Raito's mouth as he looked down. A small light turned on, but he didn't turn his eyes up. "Now."

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Watari was trying to work, the problem was that nothing came, he was empty. Everything seemed to empty….

There were several screens around the old man's chair.

Security cameras from L's room, computers with his research and data, televisions turned on news channels, Misa's rooms, to guarantee that the girl wouldn't do anything stupid while her beloved wasn't near her.

He looked at one screen in particular, which called for his attention.

"_I will remember not to complain about being empty anymore…." _

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When L was still trying to get something, to think about something for the case, even after a couple of hours in the same cycle, it was in that moment that he heard Watari's call.

At first he heard Watari's voice, and L got happy, thinking he had got something, something good, for the case. But when he noticed the frightened tone in Watari's voice, he knew it wasn't something good.

"L, turn the TV on to any channel. There is something urgent and you need to see it."

Ryuuzaki got nervous, besides surprised. What could it be? He knew it wasn't good. And mainly to seem urgent to Watari… it must be something really serious.

Matsuda took care of the TV quickly. The guy had to be useful for something….

They were all tuned in. What was Watari talking about? They were serious. Because they knew it was grave.

And then, Matsuda turned it on.

At the screen, of any channel you turned. A big "KIRA" at the same letters of when Raito and L faked to be the serial killer sent a message on television, appeared to everyone to see.

And for everyone's surprise, it spoke. With a low male voice, always interrupting himself for what seemed to be sobs. It started speaking to them, in English, indicating that the annunciation wasn't just in Japan, or even from Japan.

"Hello world. I am Kira. You can finally hear my real voice, because I am the real murderer. I wanted ask for your forgiveness. Sorry for what I have done. I realize that, this doesn't change every single death I made, but in exchange, I promise you, that, I will pay for everything I have done. My name is Yagami Raito. I am eighteen years old. I know some of you still don't believe I am Kira, but, I can prove, not by killing anyone, but by telling you how I killed. It is a note book. A note book where you write names you imagine the owner of the name, and then the person dies. I found this note one day and decided to play God…. I'm sorry… The note is buried at a forest in…"

It was really Raito's voice, L could notice! Not just L, Soichiro was nearly passing out already. But it had something in his voice… The sobs indicated he had been crying, but even that… it had something else… something else in his voice… what had he been going through? Was that all true?

"Raito… No… What do you…" The father cried "…What did they do to you?"

"…The police can go there and check to prove who I am…" Raito finished saying the coordinates of the Death Note, always sobbing "...and I am sorry for ruining so many lives… You will no more hear my name, nor my nickname. And I also will kill no more… _Sayonara_…"

With that, the transmission was over. The letters were gone and the ordinary program was back to the screen, leaving everyone at the investigation with big open and scared eyes.

What had just happened?

"That… That… What did they obligate my son to do…? They must have threatened him to assume himself as Kira or they would kill him!" the Yagami father said. He was probably the most scared of all of them; he would never admit his son was a mass murder, never.

"If that was the case…" L was looking down, in deep thought, he was the one who was searching for the true, not to hide in a comforting lie "…Then they could have done it days ago… No… they didn't threaten him, they persuaded him after many 'days after days of torture for him to do that. I don't know if it is true or not. But by his report, I wouldn't consider him as guilty After all he was my suspect and probably that was why they have kidnapped him." L said calm and slow.

"Ryuuzaki… Are you saying…" Soichiro was going to say something, something with an angry face, but was interrupted by his mobile, he got it and took it to his ear "Hello? … No… It can't be… Ok… I'm going to get it, thank you Ide. Bye." After sometime at the phone he turned it off and looked down to the others, seeming sad "Ide called me. He and a team found a note just like Higuchi had at the exactly place Raito told us of. That proves he is Kira…"

"I'm sorry boss…." Matsuda tried to comfort him as the old man started to cry.

"My son… is a Serial Killer… Now everything makes sense… Now his kidnapping makes sense… the transmission… everything…" He cried "… What did I do to deserve this?"

L listened in silence as Matsuda tried to calm Soichiro. He thought of something to say, but it probably wasn't the most important moment. If this was the father who supported a son in his worse moments, then he understood how Raito thought, how he could think that he could make a better world by killing bad people.

"I'm sorry… I'm getting out of here…." Aizawa stood up and started talking, and everybody, except L, looked at him. "If Raito is the real Kira and we have proof of that, then there is no reason for staying in here… The investigation is over…."

"He-he's right…!!" Matsuda agreed, Soichiro nodded and then started to stand up walk away.

"You're wrong and you know that." L finally spoke. "It is not over because we still have to find Raito-kun. Or is it that because of your just discovery you will let him rot in the hands of some sick bastards who are as much criminals as him? Really? Even you Yagami-san? I thought you were a better father than that…." he scratched his foot with another foot, looking at them.

Soichiro smiled.

"Aren't you the three greatest detectives in the entire world? Didn't he get kidnapped by your own fault?" L looked at him, with open shocked eyes "Then, I am sure you will find him. L… _Sayonara_"

They left the belts and everything else L had given to them for the investigation in that room, got everything that was theirs, before walking out from there to never come back anymore.

And as L watched them leaving the building from the security cameras, as he felt his eyes tearing up.

He heard pats and a hand on his shoulders, before breaking down and crying. "Watari…"

"I know Ryuuzaki… You know I will never abandon you…" Watari said as the hold L, who cried harshly in his shoulders. The onyx eyed hadn't cried like this in years… if he had ever… "We will find him together… No matter how many tries it takes…"

"Thank you…" He said, sobbing as he continued to cry out tears.

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"Well done boy. Now it's just minutes until you'll be declared officially Kira and dead…" the man said to Raito who was chained to the floor and wall.

He nodded and then heard the older man walking out.

And as he felt liquid coming down from his hurt cheeks, he knew he was going to faint soon.

Because the pain was going away….

But it wasn't for much longer… just until they woke him up and everything started again… he was so tired… so sick of this… he wanted to disappear… to erase Kira from the world….

Because he was right, the man was right… people didn't care for him… mankind was too stubborn to accept change, even if it was for the better… there was no reason to be Kira anymore… if people were as sick as these man with him were….

He had failed in his mission… in his dream of a better world… the perfect world…

But then, if he had failed, he had no dream anymore, nothing left...

What was he living for?

He wasn't even sure if he wanted to live, but if he died, wouldn't he go to hell?

Or worse… to the Nothingness?

He had no purpose anymore… not to live, not to die….

L had probably already given up trying to find him. He would probably stay there forever….

_L… _

He cleaned up his tears.

"_We are going to meet each other again in hell… Ryuuzaki…" _

And with that thought, he closed his eyes and fainted, as it floated around his mind, the first comforting thing in weeks.

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_To Be Continued… _

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**Pinku: **-sighs- you know what to do… way or not… I ask you… review, please?


	7. Sixth

Disclaimer: Again… Death Note is not mine, just the anti-kira group is!! (sigh)

Warnings: Torture, yaoi, ooc, violence, suffering, rape… etc… muahahaha!!

Summary: When Raito is kidnapped, L goes in search for him. But will he be able to find him before the God falls to his knees? torture/rape LxRaito

Pairing: L and Raito

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_Chapter __Sixth _

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Useless.

It was useless.

Everything he could do was useless.

Mankind would not change. Never. No matter how many times he tried. Human beings were hopeless. They were evil, violent, selfish**,** liars, betrayers, killers… and had everything deep-rooted into their souls in a way so that nobody could take it off.

That was what the world was like, and nothing would ever change. Never.

That was why everything he could do was useless. As Kira, as anything, it was useless. Nothing could change people, mankind would not change even if he tried every single way he could think of.

People never change.

He thought of dying too. But just of thinking about being nothing at all, made him uncomfortable…. However, this was just one of the theories… the others were worse… it made him vomit, just with the thought…

…Just with the thought about being with them_ forever_, somewhere or another.

…And he probably would go to "another place" anyway… the one below, they say, is far worse than anything anyone has ever seen… He doubted this latter was worse than that previous one, but at least where he was found now,there was only him. And there? It would be many other people with him. No… it was better to stay here, alone and _alive_…

That was the only reason for why he did not wish to die.

…Because there was no difference between this world and the other world. Therefore, it was far much better to stay in a place where these hopeless human beings were not so close: in his own world.

…Because everything was useless.

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Kira was the only thing that people were talking about for a couple of weeks. After nearly two months since the last time L had seen Raito, now, the detective could see his face every time he looked on TV, because the chestnut-haired-boy was on all of the news channels; they discussed about his statement, talked about Raito's personal life, how it was, how he was raised, his personality, his parents, what brought him to do kill criminals as Kira, how he killed, and then why he asked for forgiveness on the media.

But that only helped to make things worse, for everybody.

It was so bad that the Yagami family had to hide themselves, from the angry anti-kira people, from the media, from the Kira fans themselves…

It was horrible.

L felt smothered.

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It was a dark place; he couldn't see anything. It was cold and there was nothing to cover him.

He couldn't move himself; chained with his hands above his head. The pain in his shoulders just increased more and more.

The place stunk of vomit and urine, the few excrements his body couldn't contain, because of the small quantity of food and, of course, water. He had not taken a shower anytime since he had been taken to this place'.

Two weeks after they made him talk, they entered that small metallic room just a few times, mostly to give him food and water. They delivered water every three days, only making sure that the boy did not die; delivering food only once a week was more than enough for them.

The chocolate-eyed young man hadn't had any kind of idea of what the time was since a long time ago. He had no idea how long had been passed since he had gotten in there, nor how long after that speech it was. For him, both seemed like ages ago. The chestnut haired one only tried not to go insane. But he could feel it was getting harder and harder. Just by being alone in this dark place, with no sense of day and night… it was very hard…

His leg was still hurting like hell. But after what they did to him a couple weeks ago, now it was his face which hurt more.

They gave him some stitches; however, it was a homemade job. Nothing medical and no anesthesia either; only a man with a needle and thread; sewing like Raito was some sort of embroidery. And they didn't care. They hadn't had to have done that. They only did so because Kira could not die for them, not yet. They still had many more punishments to give him, and if he died, everything would break apart, not that they actually cared for his death… it was just… more pleasant to punish him. They hated him that much.

And Raito knew that.

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L was having trouble breathing. He tried and tried, and it just got harder and harder. The more he watched what they talked about Raito, worse his lungs got.

It was his friend! His friend and only friend! How could they say something like that about him?!

He inhaled from the bag, one Watari gave him to help him breathe. The old man also told him not to watch those things, but the detective knew he could not fulfill that request, because if there was anything important for the investigation, he had to know. If anything could save Raito, he had to know.

Besides, now Ryuuzaki was one-hundred percent sure that the young man did not do this to himself. He did not pretend a kidnap for some kind of Kira plan. The Yagami boy would never submit himself to that speech, and even more, crying. He was too proud for this. He would never humiliate himself just to trick L in some stupid game. Raito was not the kind of person who did these kinds of things. He did smart games, mind games, to L to think about it, and nothing involving a fake kidnap and a fake confession, on international television! He liked to be on top, to keep his flawless image; he would never do that speech by free will. Before, L could not be one-hundred percent sure, but now he could. Raito had not done this to himself.

Somebody did this to him, and this person had done something to him, that made him say that speech.

L listened to the tape with Raito's confession, the same one he made on the television, again, and this time, he listened carefully to that sobbing voice.

"What did they do to you, Raito-kun?" He asked to himself while he listened. When it ended, he sighed and pressed the button to call his loyal friend. "Any clues of where this came from Watari?"

"No." He answered immediately, "Apparently the system of every TV station has been invaded. They don't know where that transmission came from, and neither how it came, However, I am still searching."

"Thanks. I think I will help you…" L replied to the old man. "There is nothing here apparently…."

"Ryuuzaki…." Watari felt the sad tone on L's voice; he was giving up. He could not give up! "Don't give up; you know you are the only one who is still with him, who is trying to find him, right? He is counting on you, that boy."

"I know…" L said, looking down to his untouched cake. "… I won't give up…at least not yet… "We have not lost yet"

"Don't worry; I'm here with you…" Watari assured him.

"I know…" L said in a low voice, "and I'm counting on it."

And at the background, both of the man could hear the tape of Raito's confession, with one of his last sentences.

"…_Sayounara…"_

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_To Be Continued… _

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**Pinku: **and we are here… I started the next chapter already so it shouldn't take soo long to next chapter… I wanna also thank all reviewers who read the old version and this version.. I remember that it used to have more than 100…

The next chapter it must have lot's of change here too. To you who want L to save Raito and find be happy… though I don't 100percent assure you that you be completely happy… xDD but you will be a little satisfied…

Anyway

What did you think 'till now? liked? Make an author happy and review!! n.n


	8. Seventh

_Beta Read version_

**Pinku:** I'm so sorry for taking so long with this chapter, but I am just _terrible_ with police investigations! _Terrible_! I repeat. _Terrible_! And this chapter needed one… That is why I took so long… It was just lack of ideas…

I think this chapter is quite big for some reason. I think this is annoying… But I couldn't write less because it is an important chapter… and I couldn't make it better too… so, if you find anything stupid, wrong, or just annoying, please ignore… xD

But here it is, I hope is not too bad xD

Enjoy \o\

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Disclaimer: Tsugumi Ohba owns Death Note, but anti-kira group is mine.

Warnings: Torture, yaoi, ooc, violence, suffering, rape… etc….

Summary: When Raito is kidnapped, L goes in search for him. But will he be able to find him before the God falls to his knees? torture/rape LxRaito

Pairing: L and Raito

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When The God Fell Apart 

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_Chapter Seventh _

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_Five Years._L could not help but think. It had already been five whole yearssince Raito got kidnapped. It had been five whole years trying to rescue him. These men knew how to not leave a single track pretty well. They probably, no, they surely moved their main hideout every time. In these years, the detective found several pieces of evidence of places the kidnappers might have been in, but every time they got at the mentioned place, it was completely empty.

And now… now he looked for a new place, new evidences, new tracks… He felt deep inside his core he was close, so close to finally, _finally,_ getting the right clue, the right track, putting an end to this, a_nd getting Raito back._

"How's research going, Watari?" L asked his forever trustful friend through his computer. The detective was tracking down evidence from his computer system; Watari was doing the same but from somewhere else. After all, the man was the connection between L and the world, since the raven haired didn't get out. Both investigations seemed to be going fine, comparing to earlier attempts.

"It's going okay, Ryuuzaki. Soon, I'll send you the report." It was the reply the detective received, but he knew that "going okay" was just a euphemism for "it could be better." The old man was just being sugar coating his words for L.

Just because they were going fine comparing to the past, didn't mean they were going fine in the general way. But even so, the detective thought they might be close to an essential track that would lead to the imprisonment of the criminals.

He thought that because, after analyzing Raito's confessing tape several times, L was able to identify a few sounds. This by itself was a clue. Another was when they put the confession on the TV. They didn't send it to TV stations and threaten them on what would happen if they didn't do what they were told to. Apparently, the kidnappers took control of the satellites. This was a very important clue. L tracked where the control came from. If it still existed, it could lead them to the kidnappers. Of course it wasn't easy; these kidnappers were very smart and artful.

Over the years they paid attention to every clue, every abandoned building which might be used for kidnapping around the world, the police radio stations also helped them on kidnapping, anybody suspect going to a hospital or any other possible related subject, like buying informatics gears, pharmaceutical needs, ropes or anything a person needed to kidnap anybody, control a satellite and take the data from L's computer system.

Hopeful or not, several weeks went by in that same routine. Sometimes, when there was nothing moving them forwards, L started a new case, because compared to this one, all of them where easy, and he needed to feel the sensation that he could do it, he could win. He would not let Raito stay in the hands of those people, not because of his mistake, not because of anything. Raito was his business; if Raito was Kira, then L was going to care of it. If Raito was kidnapped, then L was going to take him back.

Watari continued with Raito's case while L had been on another case for some days. Right now, L had just finished an easy case. It was about a serial killer who was terrifying a town in an European country. The Detective hadn't even restarted getting data from the case, or seeing the new information Watari had collected, when the old man called L to inform him of some news.

"Ryuuzaki."

"Yes, did you find anything new, Watari?" L asked anxious.

"Yes. A body actually." The detective's wide eyes became wider. Could it be Raito's body? Could they have killed him? "A Body very much alike Raito appeared this week in Kanto. The Yagami family was called to identify him."

"Keep going." L was sure it was not just that, he could read it in Watari's voice.

"They did recognize the body as being Raito Yagami. And I also went to check on him, and made a couple of tests, blood samples, and compared to the ones we got years ago before arresting Raito. The result is, the male body is not Raito. But, if I hadn't done the tests I would have thought he was the Yagami boy too. Here, I took some pictures, see for yourself." L received the pictures immediately. The man did look like Raito, maybe a little too much. The detective closed in the image for a better image, to details. And what he saw? Nothing. No scar, his skin was clean, only with the natural decomposing, but out of that, not a single scar.

If Raito has been dead, wouldn't he present several scars, from years and years of mistreating?

"What was the cause of death? Did they perform a necropsy?" L asked the old man.

"The Yagami's parents didn't authorize it. But was I still able to convince a doctor in the necropsy department to make one; it will be finished in a couple of hours" Watari informed.

"Alright, thanks." L made the picture become bigger for him. And looking the line between forehead and the hair, L could see something very thin, very delicate; it was a scar. "Watari did you see this?" He asked pointing to what he just found.

The older man looked to the pointed area "Plastic surgery?" He suggested. The other nodded at this.

"It's a possibility; perhaps to send us off the track."

"Very well, then I will start researching for any legal or illegal buying of medical and surgical objects."

"Yes, and I will start tracking down the true identity of this person."

The connection went off as both started doing their specific tasks. Watari went to investigate the black market, a possible place where they could have bought the material to change a person's face without raising any suspicious about the buying. And L went to track the missing person; it had to be between 16 and 25 years, Asian and male. He was separating the files to himself of anybody with these specifications. He did not only look in the missing people file, but on the missing criminals too. Who said the body they took wasn't one their fellow kidnappers?

L was thinking about it while he investigated. Would they be so careless to do this? Why would they do it? They could easily get an unknown random body it would be much better for misleading the investigation. A body from one of their own criminals would be too obvious, wouldn't it?

Perhaps somebody became useless, and they wanted to get rid of him? Or Revenge; because the man betrayed them or something? It could even be because the man had an idea and the other didn't like it. Perhaps he killed himself, or died of natural causes. Not that it mattered, though, he was already dead and L was going to find out who he was and how he died, period.

And it was this moment, the greatest detective in the world realized. It would be obvious if it was one of their men, but it would be even more obvious if it wasn't. Because everybody would think it was just a random man they picked up because of his characteristics. Nobody would think it could be one of their men, because nobody would think they would do something like this.

Two hours later, Watari called back with the result of the necropsy. "Ryuuzaki, the results of the necropsy are done. Apparently the man killed himself with anti-depressants." Anti-depressants, it wasn't impossible one of the kidnappers to be with clinical depression, but L just doubted he took medicine for it regularly. It was probably stolen or from a fake prescription.

"Alright, I'll check the areas which anti-depressant medications were bought or stolen recently. You check the black market and any other illegal areas," L told him

"Very well." The call ended and they went to their jobs.

L continued what he was doing before, and also started getting into the data of any place who could sell medications.

In a few minutes he had a list with dozens of criminals wanted, dozens of people missing both with Raito's basic characteristics just from Japan. The list with Japan's list of bought and/or stolen anti-depressants and where they were bought and/or stolen from wasn't done yet.

He list was very long, and while it downloaded, L decided to check the already done list of missing people in Japan. He started checking the wanted, criminals who ran away from the justice and weren't captured yet. Reading their files fastly, L was just looking for anybody who could be useful for an anti-kira group or be a part of one. It would be easy since lots of these criminals were wanted for killing, the group was probably against Kira, and therefore it would be against killing. _"Even so, one of them killed himself,"_ the detective thought. But them he realized killing each other and killing themselves was something completely different. Killing another person was homicide, and kill yourself was suicide; your own choice, a choice you don't have when you're being murdered.

He stopped when he saw a face. It wasn't pretty; it wasn't an impressive kind of face. However it was exactly what L was looking for.

It was a young man; 24 years old, L could read in his file. His hair was brown, just like Raito's but it was long, going all way to his back. He didn't have bangs, and everything was in a pigtail which fell down his back. His eyes were dark, and cold. His face all thin, his nose was big and his lips were small. The raven haired detective thought they could have easily made a surgery to make him look like Raito, though he already looked at little alike in this picture. But, what made the man even more interesting was not his face, but his background. He was sent to the police for stealing forbidden data, and mistreating supporters of Kira.

Was this too perfect, too easy? Perhaps, but L could not say it was right or not; at least not yet.

After a couple of days, the investigation went in the same line. L didn't find anything suspicious in any buying of medications and Watari hadn't called him yet. Any other missing or wanted men had called more to his attention than that first one; therefore, his attention was turned towards him; all the others were less subtle so the first one was where L's suspicions were

Nobody had seen this criminal in the past six years. Since the first Kira appeared, the detective noted at that time he was just 18 years old, and since he committed those crimes nobody ever saw him again.

But he was bored now. It had been two days and Watari hadn't called him for updates. He decided to call the old man. If Watari was busy he wouldn't pick it up, if he wasn't….

"Hello"

"Watari, how's everything going?"

"Actually, very well. There are points where there have been unusual purchases of medical and surgical instruments. I'm going to send the locations to you now through email." L looked at the immediately sent email; the old man was fast. And he was also right; the younger of the two could see something in common about the points. They were all around the places were they thought Raito could be, but never was. "I'm checking right now about illegal anti-depressant buying but what I've found up to now fits in the area."

"Wait a second Watari." L was suddenly excited, this was excellent; an excellent clue for them to move on. It would actually lead them to something material, evidence to where Raito truly was. Therefore, the raven haired turned to his computer, and in less than a minute, what he went to look for, appeared on the screen "You're right, it does fit. The kidnappers have been reducing their area of action." How could he have missed it?

L bitted his thumb. He was nervous. He had been close like this before, and every time, it ended in an empty place._ "We needed to think ahead of them, act before them."_ It was what he told himself. They needed to get them before they moved to another place, or find the place they were about to move to next and make a trip there. That was the way to rescue Raito.

After thanking his friend and turning off the cell, he went to check all his news on patterns. The first and last purchases of each item; it was what he first noticed; they were on opposite sides. There were about thirty places where they bought medical stuff, and about three with the medications. All of them separated in different parts of Europe and Asia, with one purches in the USA and another one in Australia. L first thought these two places didn't matter, that they were probably there to mislead his investigation from the place that truly mattered, but then he thought, it could be right; the opposite and those two were the ones that mattered, being the ones in the Europe, Asia and Africa the one to mislead. After so many years running after them, L had learned they were quite unpredictable.

He matched the area of the surgical equipment with the three from the medications, taking out the area which didn't and staying with the ones which did. USA and north Europe went out; the area was very small, much too small, since the previous one was bigger. He checked what he had now. The last place where they bought equipment was there, and a few where they searched and found empty places, plus one more where they had never found any evidence pointing to. Australia.

"It's too obvious…" L knew about the history of the big country being used as prison and things like that, but he could not think it was being used as Raito's current prison. It was too obvious wasn't it? And what physical, material evidence did he have? He had no proof the kidnappers had bought those materials… He had only his trust in himself, Watari, and the hope that he was going to,_ soon,_ take his first and only friend back.

Perhaps that was what he needed: self confidence.

He called Watari again. "Watari, direct your investigations towards Australia"

"Do you think the kidnappers took him there?" The old man asked

"I have a hunch." The Greatest Three Detectives in the World answered.

And resuming the investigations to a single place, instead of the whole world, was much easier to investigate, since they already had points and an area to start with.

They looked back in records and found that the fake-Raito has been living there for 2 weeks after Japan started looking for him later, he moved to several other places, each time with different names.

That was a point for them.

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"Raito," L whispered, thinking about him.

After a couple of months in the country, they had continued their search for the boy to even a smaller place. The Deserts; they were too hot at day, too cold at night, perfect to torture somebody. And that was where Raito was being held.

They had found evidence, how, L still was a bit confused, but it was where everything lead him to, and that was where it was currently going.

He had a police team, Watari, and with him, they were all perfectly protected, with their faces covered and everything basic in protective suits, in case anything unexpected happened.

He truly hoped the unexpected would not be the nothing, because he didn't know if he was ready for another five years of investigation; or if Raito would be…. This had to work now.

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When they entered the place, it was fast and precise. L was surprised at how perfect it was. The place was very big. It was constructed not too far away from the closest town.

The detective could see that all the men had their faces covered with black ski-masks, sunglasses, they were also with gloves, boots, and their clothes were all black.

But still, no trace of Raito; were they in the right place?

One of the men they were arresting turned at him; he didn't look any different from any of the others. All tall, all covered.

"Do you want to see him? Go ahead, he's behind those walls." He laughed hard "It doesn't even matter anymore that you're arresting us. Our job is done. The evil is ended. Kira is gone. We accomplished our objective." He laughed harder, as the police officer took him out.

And that was when it hit L. The man didn't care anymore about being arrested or not, that was why the evidence was obvious. They were crazy, and didn't care about anything besides their objective. That man who committed suicide was probably the sanest man who used to be there.

However, the detective didn't care about their sanity, in a few days they would be rotting in prison. For now, all he cared about was Raito; rescuing him.

He walked to where the crazy man had told him to. And he was right, it had a small cell. It had no windows, just a metal door.

And it was locked.

"_No problem,__"_ he thought. That was why he had brought the police team. He called a few of them, and faster than he could think, the door was open and there it was. That image, that horrible image. He had never thought he would ever see something like this in his life; maybe in pictures, maybe in movies, but in real life, with his own eyes; and worse, _with Raito, his friend and __all because of himself._

A pool of blood bathed the boy, who was chained to the wall in front of him by his wrists, ankles, and neck. His hair, longer than he could remember, but dyed from that crimson liquid, and looked like it had not seen a comb, or a shower in a long time, maybe years, and it covered his neck and face.

He was naked, and therefore, then raven haired man could see his back, painted with scars and wounds of many colors, from red to purple.

L refused to turndown his eyes and looked at him more.

"Raito-kun," the detective whispered, not sure if Raito was listening or not. L was suddenly paralyzed, his feet didn't work, and his hands were trembling. "_What did those people do to you?" _

The paramedics of the team got there fast. They ran to Raito and one of them put a finger on his neck, trying to catch a pulse, a breath, anything.

L could only stay there, watching breathlessly.

"He's alive!! Quick, get the.." The paramedic screamed, but the black eyes male had stopped listening.

L smiled. Raito was alive. He had taken him back. Now he would be okay.

Because the rough part had just finished.

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_To be Continued… _

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**Pinku: **Of course it's not going to be okay… It would be too easy… xD

Ooh and about Australia… I'm sorry anything, but I'm currently obsessed in an actor, and he's Australian, so, I'm also obsessed about Australia! S2 that's the reason… xD nothing too special, sorry anything, again…

I'm still wondering if the leader should have been arrested in this or if he ran away and is free… But I think I have an idea…

And I'm sorry if I took so long to update this, it was a very hard chapter, and, again, I'm _terrible_ with police investigations… x.x

But what did you think of it? Again, I ask for you to ignore anything bad, stupid or any error you see because I'm just that bad… xD but… if you're willing, just review and make an author happy!!


	9. Eighth

Disclaimer: Tsugumi Ohba (and maybe others) own(s) Death Note, but anti-kira group (and this plot!) is mine!

Warnings: Torture, yaoi, ooc, violence, suffering, rape… etc, etc… and oh yeah, I beta read it (for real!), so any errors are my entire fault!!

Summary: When Raito is kidnapped, L goes in search for him. But will he be able to find him before the God falls to his knees? torture/rape LxRaito

Pairing: L and Raito

Pinku: yeey!! (With cheers and angels singing Hallelujah in the back) I continued! Yeey!!

And I wrote in this chapter some things that you may think are useless but I can assure you are for you understand better some things from future chapters… so just get along! (And because I like! of course)

And enjoy!

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When The God Fell Apart 

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_Chapter __Eighth _

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_A pool of blood bathed the boy, who was chained to the wall in front of him by his wrists, ankles, and neck. His hair, longer than he could remember, but dyed from that crimson liquid, and looked like it had not seen a comb, or a shower in a long time, maybe years, and it covered his neck and face. _

_He was naked, and therefore, then raven haired man could see his back, painted with scars and wounds of many colors, from red to purple. _

_L refused to turndown his eyes and looked at him more. _

"_Raito-kun," the detective whispered, not sure if Raito was listening or not. L was suddenly paralyzed, his feet didn't work, and his hands were trembling. "What did those people do to you?" _

_The paramedics of the team got there fast. They ran to Raito and one of them put a finger on his neck, trying to catch a pulse, a breath, anything. _

_L could only stay there, watching breathlessly. _

"_He's alive!! Quick, get the..." The paramedic screamed, but the black eyes male had stopped listening. _

_L smiled. Raito was alive. He had taken him back. Now he would be okay. _

_Because the rough part had just finished. _

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_Five years. _

L could count how many days, how many hours, and how seconds Raito had been in the hands of those men.

However, the detective couldn't tell what the boy felt, what he had been through all these years in the hands of that crazy group.

He couldn't feel or imagine, what he suffered, the pain, everything he felt in these five years while he was been held captive.

All he could do was to observe, watch and hope he could cure himself from the several wounds, broken bones on the ribs, legs, arms, concussions, and many more.

Scars he counted fifty only on his back, there were ones with various types, since small until those big ones, those ones which indicated he healed from a big, pained bruise that also bled and hurt for a long time before it got cured.

And these ones were the physical ones. The mental ones, he probably would not be capable to count.

And then there was that foot. He tried to imagine how much pain he probably had to endure only for that leg. But L was and always had been selfish, spoiled and egocentric. He couldn't imagine, how is to feel it. He couldn't even understand it, to feel or to make. Perhaps that was way he had his one-sided thought about Justice and couldn't accept others opinions.

Perhaps that was why he was L…

At the moment the detective was in a chair in the waiting room. It wasn't a real hospital, it was in his own head quarter building, he had everything prepared with every equipped he might need for that moment and hired the best doctors, nurses and paramedics possible.

Of course that didn't mean Raito would actually survive.

After the paramedics - which also had medical degree and medical license - left the tortured young man in the hands of the doctors and nurses, they told L he was in a critic condition and that behind all the blood mess it was even worse underneath.

And so, Raito entered for the so urgent surgery. And he was there for hours. And the paramedics' information was the only L had. The doctors were probably too busy to update him. But that was alright. Better do a good job than ass-kiss the boss and kill the patient. After all that was why they were hired for… that only meant L hired the right people.

About half a day later – give it or take, L lost time at some point – one of the nurses came to him. L looked up, wondering if they had finished.

"Ryuuga-san" She called for his pseudonym. "The surgery is over. The young male recovering in the clean room you had prepared. It's probably best if nobody visit him. He's still critical, and we don't know if he'll be stable. We'll continue observing him, but we tried best to stabilize him and take care of his wounds, bruises, broken bones and anything his body needed"

"Tried?" L asked. What did she meant with that, they couldn't do it?

"Yes well…" She started, not knowing quite well how to say it. "Some injures are old. It's impossible to heal because his body has already done the job on his own, his right leg for example. It probably took a very long time, but his body healed the bone, in that wrong way."

L lowered his head. He was predicting it. He looked at her again "Can't it be fixed?"

"Maybe with another surgery, but his leg's damage is so big that even fixing to be on the right shape, he'll be in pain for the rest of his life…"

"The only way to solve it would be cutting down that leg right on his ankles" L thought out loud, mumbling. But he knew that would be a choice for Raito. After all cutting a limb was much more complicated than scissors and papers.

The nurse watched her boss, with worried eyes. After years waiting for this moment she would never think it would be this bad.

"Okay, thanks. Let me know when I can see him" L said, turning away and leaving. The nurse nodded and left too.

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In Raito's mind he didn't know where he was. He was in that blackness everybody goes when start a deep sleep. He wasn't dreaming, he wasn't conscious, but he wasn't completely unconscious either.

In his mind he didn't care where he was. He thought he knew there was something different; different noises; a constant beep, a fizz… it was so strange. Normally there was just silence when they left him alone…

He hadn't any will of opening his eyes. Not that he could. He didn't even think about it. He was in that state of mind people in which don't think they were sleeping or even unconscious.

He felt pain. That why he didn't discovered he left the place where suffered all those years of torture. If he was with him family wouldn't he feel pain free? Wouldn't he feel good and happy? But those good feelings were gone since a long time ago… they were dead.

Yes, because as always in his life, some part of him always has to die. First the normal bored teen, then the good and thirsty for justice Raito who beside L tried to catch the international mass murderer, and then the last one… the serial killer of criminals, that one who had made him happy and made the adrenaline hush in his veins and made his entire IQ struggle inside his brains, the first and only one: Kira.

Because nobody else had been as good in the task as him, he knew it

So he laid in darkness, waiting for whatever expected for him when he woke up.

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Weeks had gone quite quickly for L.

He was in the main room of his head quarter; in front of him a new case to occupy his mind; beside him, in another screen, an image of Raito's room, with the teen lying in bed, looking peacefully.

In these weeks Raito had entered in a coma. The doctors told L it was probably to help the body to heal properly and fast, lowering the metabolism and everything inside of him, a survival mechanism. The detective wondered if he entered in a coma like these before, when he was with those people. But then he decided he couldn't keep thinking about it anymore. Those men were in prison, and with the amount of proofs L had against them they could be sentenced to death, or life, since Australia abolished death penalty, even without Raito's testimony in court.

So he changed his track of thoughts. The doctors had told him a good thing about Raito was that he was in stables conditions. That meant the condition he was currently in – good or not – was not getting any worse. Now he just needed time to recover.

The now former Kira had a bunch of things attached to him. He had several strings in his chest to monitor his heart beating, pulse and other things; he had in his finger an oxygen monitor - if he stopped breathing that would tell them – he had strings for the sera and liquid medicine – mostly pain medications - to enter his veins in his arms, in his mouth a tube to enter oxygen in his body, and down in his stomach there was another one to feed him, and between his legs another one for his personal necessities.

Basically, it was L's personal hospital. Because the bed Raito was in was a hospital bed, and that room had everything a hospital room has, even professional doctors…

The detective finished the case he was working successfully. It was an easy case. So he left and went to the elevator and went to the last floor, where Raito's room was. He decided last floor was best because of the pressure. Bacteria were weak to low atmosphere pressure, so it was safer for the young male there. It was a question of pressure inside and pressure outside. It was also the basic theory and process of the _Hyperbaric Chamber_, used in medicine for many treatments, if the pressure outside it's changed – comparing with the pressure inside, because they had to be equal – you would die. But obviously was quite useless because the entire room – and possibly and building – was (were) sterile, but being safe was never too much, right? Perhaps those doctors would enter and bring some bacteria with them… L never trusted people.

When L got in the room the nurse was leaving it right after setting another dose of morphine. The doctors explained to L it was the most appropriate since the amount of pain he would feel. Despite the addiction danger, safely, hopefully nothing would happen, and L knew they were right. Raito had broken bones, muscular injures and that right leg had had yet to be examined when he was awake but L and the doctors suspected of nerve damage. So, lot of a pain, too much pain.

L then just sat in a chair beside the boy in the bed. He would eat something good, like cake, but he was too paranoid about bacteria and viruses these days… so no cake in the room.

He just sat there, watching the probably no longer teen, how old was he now? Twenty two? Twenty three? No, definitely not a teen anymore. Now he was man.

…A very unfortunate man.

So L watched the young man softly breathe in and out. The noise of the oxygen going inside his lungs and of the heart monitor in his ear hypnotizing him…

…he almost didn't even notice when Raito slowly and carefully opened his eyes and looked around until he found his…

"Raito-kun" He said in a low tone. Eyes wide open. "Good morning" He said, just watching as the young man's expression didn't move, it wasn't surprised, happy or even confused.

It was just there, looking at him, just looking… with no emotions reflected inside…

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_To be Continued… _

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**Pinku: **Uuuh… Australia abolished Death Penalty right? If I was wrong please correct me so I correct the story o.o''

Anyway sorry if you didn't like anything here… and… the medical part (okay not really medical, õo) it's because I hate when people jump it… (really it's the best part!) and a little drama can't do bad to anyone! (except maybe Raito…) and of course as I said earlier, to understand better things from future chapters (what exactly? I won't teeeelll!!! hahah

Details of Raito's leg damage next chapter and…

…if you liked, or has anything (not too mean, 'cause I get hurt real easily) just review and tell me (happy me updates faster) :)


	10. Ninth

Disclaimer: Tsugumi Ohba (and maybe others) own(s) Death Note, but anti-kira group (and this plot!) is mine!

Warnings: Torture, yaoi, ooc, violence, suffering, rape, not beta read and it's just a fiction not a biography, and I'm not a specialist so things here can be not 100percent accurate. And I know I should also say OOCness, but I don't want to admit that, so it's gonna be left unsaid…

Summary: When Raito is kidnapped, L goes in search for him. But will he be able to find him before the God falls to his knees? torture/rape LxRaito

Pairing: L and Raito

Pinku: winter break is awesome isn't it?

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When The God Fell Apart 

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_Chapter __Ninth _

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After L' doctors took out the tube of Raito's throat, because he was awake, nothing different happened. The tube was substituted for a breathing mask, because the young man was still not breathing right and was still too weak.

Raito remained just watching L, silently, and L remained just looking at Raito; both looking at each other without saying a word.

L didn't know what the other was thinking. He knew he could, he should, be able to talk, because exams showed no permanent damaged in his throat. What he had should have had already been cured, and he should be able to talk.

So it was probably one of the consequences of being held captive for five years.

The detective was told by the doctors about the scars and injures in the other's body. It showed not light, spanking, but heavy torture, there were whip marks in his back, burn marks in several places in his body, in his wrists and ankle there were chain marks and the doctors confirmed it was probably used in a torture machine were you pull and extend the body forcefully, cause high amounts of pain. There were also little circular marks, dots: in his back they were smaller, what was probably a sign they were spits, pins, maybe nails. The larger ones, which were in more random places looked more like cigarette marks, like somebody was using him like an ashtray.

And there was also that right leg. Whose foot was complete turned around almost ninety degrees, completely breaking it, the nerves and muscles are permanently damaged, what will probably cause pain for the rest of his life.

But of course L knew for experiences in other cases that even if there wasn't much physical torture, just the psychological torture was enough to make people go crazy, traumatized for possibly the rest of their life.

With all those thoughts in his mind, plus the fact the detective also didn't know what to say, he stayed in silent, only waiting for something, anything.

When he realized he had work to do, he asked Watari to bring his laptop, and started doing work in that room.

He could feel Raito's empty gaze watching him, watching as every finger and thumbs of his moved.

When he finished it was already late at night, L realized. Raito should be tired. He should go sleep. Wasn't he tired? Perhaps he was in pain and couldn't sleep because of it…

The black haired looked at him, no pain showed in his face. Of course he knew the latter was never a man to show was he was feeling, but pain is something you can never hide.

L knew he had to say something, anything.

"Is Raito-kun feeling alright?" He asked the first thing that went through his head. He waited as a small, almost imperceptible nod was made. "Does he know where he is? Does he know he is in the old headquarter, in the same place where once he used to work?" another small nod "Does he know how he got here?" a shake, figured "I was investigating your kidnap since the day they got you. When they made you confess for the world your father and rest abandoned the case, but I remained. I confess I did discovered who it was a long time ago, but they were good at hiding, I just could find they not too long ago, and for that I'm sorry. I also have to apologize for making Raito leave in the occasion he was kidnapped. I know it won't change anything, but I hope I can make things up for you helping you now" L apologized. He didn't know where it came from, it went out from his throat suddenly, but he guessed it was something he wanted to say to the younger male a long time ago; like he was chocked with it, it needed to be said it to feel better.

It was then he heard a sound, a sound he didn't expect to heard and had not listened in years. It was low, raspy but he could understand all the three letters that had been said.

"Why?" Raito managed to talk inside his oxygen mask. It was an weak and broken voice, said by a weak and broken man.

L blinked a few times, thinking how many times would take for him to hear Raito's voice again.

He thought what he should answer, but decided to say the truth. He judge the younger male was probably in an incredibly vulnerable position and needed to trust somebody. At least that was what Watari told him.

"Like I say it was my fault this happened with you, but despite that I believe it's incredibly inhuman to do what they did to you. No matter what the person had done in his/her life. Therefore it was my duty to rescue you, after all you are my first and only friend, friends care for each other. At least it's what I was told…"

L waited for an answer anxiously, but all he got was a small, weak nod of the other's head.

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When Raito wake up, he was confused; his head was spinning a little, his vision blurred. But most of all, he didn't know where he was. It was too comfortable to be where he used to be, but he couldn't believe he had been rescued, after all he had been Kira, he didn't think anybody would want to.

And then was the pain. If he had been rescued, what was hardly it, shouldn't he been free of it?

He had passed his eyes around the room. He realized it was completely different from every place he used to be. And then there he was, that man he judged he would never see again: L.

At first he thought L was the one who had told those guys to do those things to him, and now he had decided he was sick of watching and wanted to do it himself. So he waited and waited.

But nothing came, no more pain. More for the opposite, it came doctors with what seemed painkillers and other things.

He was being treated.

And he too realized, he knew that room, he knew that place.

It was the old headquarter; the place he once worked in.

But somehow, he didn't feel much thrill with it. It was more like an _"Oh, is it?"_ than anything.

He didn't feel like anything, not even dying. If he died he would go do Nothingness anyway. It would be terrible.

So he just watched as L watched him, and then when the latter went to work and typed something in his Laptop.

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Sometime later, Raito didn't know how much, he heard L's voice after how long? "Is Raito-kun feeling alright?" It wasn't a surprise when he realized it sounded just like he remembered it.

When he realized L needed an answer the younger nodded his head, he figured he was alright, comparing to where he was before, after all… He was just a little surprised when it was just a weak movement, but he guessed it didn't matter, after all L seemed to have got it.

"Does he know where he is?" Another question, another nod from his part. "Does he know how he got here?" Of course he didn't know, so he shook his head, weakly "I was investigating your kidnap since the day they got you. When they made you confess for the world your father and rest abandoned the case, but I remained. I confess I did discovered who it was a long time ago, but they were good at hiding, I just could find they not too long ago, and for that I'm sorry. I also have to apologize for making Raito leave in the occasion he was kidnapped. I know it won't change anything, but I hope I can make things up for you helping you now"

Raito supposed he got that… he had satisfied with the answer. Though he truly wasn't that curious to know, it was very predictable really. What he wanted to know was another thing, something he didn't and couldn't understand.

Another thing he wanted to know was his voice. He heard L's and realized the man's hadn't changed a bit. But what about his owns? He wanted to discover what had changed.

"Why?" It was all he managed to say inside that breathing mask.

"Like I say it was my fault this happened with you, but despite that I believe it's incredibly inhuman to do what they did to you. No matter what the person had done in his/her life. Therefore it was my duty to rescue you, after all you are my first and only friend, friends care for each other. At least it's what I was told…"

This answer was stupid. It wasn't L's fault, he left because he wanted…

…But most of all, he became Kira because he wanted, because at the time, he believed humans could still be saved.

And that was the only thing he thanked those kidnappers. They made him realize that human can't be saved, that people will never change, and that was just useless to try to save them.

But he didn't say that to L. He was never the one to talk what he felt, and now was no different.

So he just went back to watch him.

L seemed to be waiting something, as he watched him. Did he want him to say something? He had nothing to say.

"Does Raito-kun know how long he was held captive?" L asked, probably tired of waiting.

Did he know? Well he know it was years… So no. He shook his head.

"Five years." That was probably a long time, Raito thought. "Raito-kun's now twenty three years old, and it's now a man" L said. Well Raito supposed that was true, his math was right "So he should know the totalities of his injuries" It was weird, but all could think was_ "what a good line of thought L just had"_.

L then left the room; Raito followed him with his eyes.

It didn't take long for the detective to come back with one of the doctors with him.

"Here's here to explain to do the full extend of your injuries. He is one of the doctors taking care of you, so he should be able to explain better than me" L explained. Raito understood, but neither say nor did anything.

Raito had no opinion about the doctor. He just heard as he said something about scars, damage, chronicle pain and possibility of surgery and other stuff about his current treatment, like his medicine when he would be able to leave the oxygen and eat something real food (now he was been fed through a tube).

Raito understood, he supposed the doctor and the treatment were fine. He just nodded. And mentally thanked L for doing it.

He also mentally thanked L for saving him and for searching him all those years without giving up.

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_To be Continued… _

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**Pinku:** Okay this chapter was a whole lot of nothing! But I still like it! Next chapter probably will happen more… I want to finish it soon, so I update it fast! Are you happy? I was so happy with all these reviews… thank you all for it!! and like a said above, I'm on winter break, it's only for two weeks, but perhaps, _**perhaps**_ with big bold and italic, because the underline wasn't working, I _**may**_ update it again during these two weeks… but don't be very hopefully, I have another projects for this 2 weeks… but don't get all hopeless either! After all I love you guys!!

And I also love reviews! So send me a feedback, will ya? xD very nice with hearts, and pink and with ice cream… perhaps I'll update it soon again? huh huh??


	11. Tenth

Disclaimer: Tsugumi Ohba (and maybe others) own(s) Death Note, but anti-kira group (and this plot!) is mine!

Warnings: Torture, yaoi, ooc, violence, suffering, rape, not beta read and it's just a fiction not a biography, and I'm not a specialist so things here can be not 100percent accurate. And I know I should also say OOCness, but I don't want to admit that, so it's gonna be left unsaid… and this one has also sexual terms…

Summary: When Raito is kidnapped, L goes in search for him. But will he be able to find him before the God falls to his knees? torture/rape LxRaito

Pairing: L and Raito

Pinku: (I'm a stupid piece of shit) Oh my god!!! Can you believe I had completely forgotten about Raito's face scarred… (why none of you reminded me you it?? T.T'') I just remembered when I reading another torture!Raito fic and then I remembered of a draw of my with Raito with his scarred face… anyway, I did something about it… I hope you get along, because I can't change anything in the past… lol…

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When The God Fell Apart 

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_Chapter __Tenth _

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The first time Raito asked to see himself in a mirror was when the breathing mask was changed to a simple oxygen direct and only to his nose. He didn't know why he asked that. He had no will of see how he currently state was…

L only insisted to cut his hair before that.

So there he was, hair cut in his old cut, maybe a little bigger, like the height it was when he left from the fifth days of imprisonment with L, and looking at himself through a hand mirror.

He saw the scar on his face. L had talked about it to him. He remembered the day it got there, the pain. _His left cheek was cut in half; it went from the point of his lip until one finger before the edges of the eye. In the middle of the line, it divided into two, each one going to an extremity of the eye. _It had scarred exactly how he remembered being cut… and in the eye of the scar, the doctor said after some tests, he also lost some of his sight.

He sighed, trying to remember how his face once had been.

He handed the mirror to L again. "Here" he said, without really looking at the detective. Inside he was thanking him. He only didn't know if was only for the mirror, of for something else, but he guessed it didn't matter.

"No problem, Raito-kun" L said, placing the mirror on the small desk next to the bed "If you want anything else just tell me, or Watari, and we'll do our best to accomplish it"

Raito nodded. But something else was on his head "Am I going to jail when I get better?"

L's eyes widened, and he bit his thumb "Why Raito-kun ask that?"

"Because I'm Kira, you know I'm Kira, I'm a criminal, and therefore I should be punished"

L watched Raito's eyes. In these weeks he had been taking care of him he couldn't help but notice how lifeless they were. He wondered in exactly what moment he stopped feeling the will to live… When his leg was broken, or when his face was cut in half?

"I think Raito-kun as Kira has already being punished enough…" L declared looking at Raito's eyes, which suddenly looked down "The fact you assume yourself like this proves my point."

Raito nodded "But you said my father and the others abandoned the investigation when I assumed I was Kira, so I can't come back home…" The younger said still looking down "and wherever I ago everybody will know I'm Kira, it won't be much different than where I was until you come and rescue me"

L heard he said, but even not seeing his eyes, his voice was in a low, calm monotone, everybody who heard would think he was just cold. But from what the latter said, the detective could see otherwise. Perhaps he just became like this as a self defense mechanism, to survive all this years? But of course with people like those he wouldn't be surprised of giving everything up. However, he didn't believe he did. Raito wanted to live, L noticed it in these past weeks, he noticed it now in this sentenced, and he noticed it because he survived five years in the hands of cold blood kidnappers.

"You can stay with me Raito-kun…" L stated, he had already thought this through and even discussed with Watari and both agreed with be best to the young male to stay there "It would be great to have you in our, mine and Watari's, investigation team, and it would also be considered as a form of Parole or Community Service, he's fulfilling after a long time imprisonment... or whatever Raito'kun wishes to call, because I'm sure he understood what I meant"

Raito was looking at him now, eye on eye. "Okay" He answered, and mentally thanked L again. He didn't know exactly why he was doing it, but somehow he liked the feeling.

…It was a feeling he didn't feel for a long time… if he ever felt.

L smiled. He didn't know why, but something in him was happy now, with Raito's small and simply answer. What was pretty stupid because in the detective's realistic mind it was clear Raito would agree with him. Percentages agreed with him. It was simply the fact the younger male had no other choice…

Hmn… Why now he felt sad?

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When Raito got better L agreed that he was already good enough to introduce Raito as his helper in cases. He was already starting to eat real food since a while, wasn't eating a lot, probably because the years of eating too little in hands of his kidnappers, it made him lose his appetite, but it was getting better. He breathed by himself, only with the help of his lungs, the wounds, bruises, and broken bones already healed. Raito was physically fine. Physically.

Their first case together wasn't an easy one. L wouldn't never to that to him. He thought it would be a betrayal if he did. So it was a normal hard case, in which L was about to begun work in.

So, the detective presented the case to him. "So, do you have any first idea you would like to share?" L asked "I already said everything I wanted to" and he did, every single idea he had he had already said. The case was very hard, maybe Raito would give him some good ideas about where and how go begin it…

"Yes…" Raito said, and begun explaining his ideas about how the crime happened and the criminal. It was very good ideas. L got impressed. But it was very good; it meant Raito's geniality hadn't decreased in these years.

"Okay, let's start from there." L said as they walked to the investigation room. He noticed when Raito limped across the room with his disabled foot. The doctors told them it would get better would physical therapy, but sometimes he thought Raito didn't believe it, or didn't see to care.

When they both sat each beside one in front of a big computer, just like old days, they started working from there, researching, interviewing witnesses and interrogating possible suspects. Some of then the police had already done, but L didn't trust them since a long time ago.

The case was doing well. After a while, they both got used the new routine.

"L, look at this" Raito called him with his normal voice, not too loud, but not too low either "could be a clue"

L went to see what Raito was showing him. "Yes there is a probability of eight five percent of what Raito-kun's showing be a very important clue to the case." He stated with his own normal monotone voice and his usual thumb-biting.

Raito nodded. He couldn't think of anything else to do, or say. "Good"

"No, excellent, actually now we can follow towards a direction, and hopefully find the criminal" L stated, he was very happy with what was going on. Raito had overcome his expectations. He felt… proud? It was a confuse feeling… he was just so very happy for himself and for Raito… It was weird in a way, for him. "That's very good, congratulations, Raito-kun"

Raito looked down, nodding slightly. It was so long he didn't hear anybody congratulating him for anything he felt weird. He had grown used to being beaten everyday. He had grown used to be called a worm, or other names, and he had grown used to be a mass murderer who needed punishment. But most of all, he had grown used to the punishment itself.

The former serial killer looked up slightly; he saw how L was still close to him. So close to him…

The detective notice too how they were close, he had been looking at the new clues Raito had found, sending them to the proper document on the computer, and sending them to his own. He noticed when Raito turned his look from the floor to him. He also noticed how closed they were to each other.

And they both noticed when that small distance stopped existing, and their lips united in a small innocent kiss.

"Thank you" It was all Raito could said after they parted.

Their hearts were racing. They were confused and nervous. They had let emotions control themselves and that had never happened to them before. Either of them. What had just happened?

"You're welcome" L said, he didn't know what he was answering anymore. "Raito-kun"

"Yes?" Raito asked, looking at L, he was a little confused; he wasn't used to these things anymore.

"What do you think that just meant?" L asked. He knew that when two people kissed usually there was chemistry between them. It could be two things, lust: pure sexual desire. Or the second option, love: they had fallen in love with each other.

Could he love Raito? L knew he had never lusted for anyone. He knew it; he had never the desire to have sex with anybody. So it could only be the second, right?

The younger male was thinking… L was being so nice to him since he rescued him. "I don't know… I just know I feel you have been too good for me these weeks, months… I have no desire to leave…" Raito started saying, it was what he truly felt, he realized. "I just want to stay here with you… I don't know what that means…"

"…Raito-kun…" L looked at the scarred face in front of him. While he took his chair closer and sat, he realized the boy had said what he felt. It was the true… "Since you got kidnapped I've been in a crazy seek for you…" He spoke, deciding he had to say the true too. "…When I finally found you… and saw you the state you were… I felt…" He took a moment to think "…like I could die that moment… and when you finally awoke I… felt incredibly happy… I thought it was because of my guilt… Now I'm so sure anymore…" He finished and bit his thumb.

Raito nodded "Okay…"

L was thinking of percentages. After they both had spoke, he decided "Then there is a chance of nine percent of our kiss meant love." He said, and looked at other, when he received no answer, he continued. "The others ten percent mean lust"

After awhile thinking, Raito answered, "Okay, then I guess we love each other…"

"Yes I agree" L said in the same not-excited voice as the other had said previously. "But what are we going to do now?"

Raito thought for a moment "Probably kiss each other again, and finished the case"

For some reason, for both a then that didn't seem like the craziest idea in the world. And that was what they did.

It was then that L noticed, that wasn't only Raito body that was healing. His mind was also on the way to.

It was only a matter of time.

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_The End!__ (not really!, go read the epilogue!)_

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**Pinku:**You know, nobody else but me can call me stupid piece of shit, so, don't call me that when you review. I mean, you will review right? (puppy dog eyes)

**And don't forget to read the Epilogue**


	12. Epilogue

Disclaimer: Tsugumi Ohba (and maybe others) own(s) Death Note, but anti-kira group (and this plot!) is mine!

Warnings: Torture, yaoi, ooc, violence, suffering, rape, not beta read and it's just a fiction not a biography, and I'm not a specialist so things here can be not 100percent accurate. And I know I should also say OOCness, but I don't want to admit that, so it's gonna be left unsaid… and this one has also sexual terms…

Summary: When Raito is kidnapped, L goes in search for him. But will he be able to find him before the God falls to his knees? torture/rape LxRaito

Pairing: L and Raito

Pinku:  weee (dancing) finally, I'm finishing it! I hope you enjoy!! It's quite short, but it gives a cute end for the story…

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When The God Fell Apart 

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_Epilogue _

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Two years had passed, quite fast actually. Two years ago Raito was being rescued from the kidnappers.

Today he was completing twenty five years of age.

He still remembered everything he had being through.

He still remembered everything he did as Kira.

He still thought he would never be the same again.

And he still thought human kind was rotten and hopeless. He had never left the headquarters, and never would. He didn't want any contact with those filthy humans again.

L thought it might be some _Agoraphobia;_ Raito didn't want to leave because he was afraid of people, afraid of what they may do to him now everybody knew he was Kira, maybe some kind of a _Post-traumatic Stress Disorder. _

Raito didn't care the motives. He didn't want to leave because he didn't want to face any people, period.

He only person he wished to face was L, it was the only one he wished to spend time to. With times, Watari, but the older man didn't count.

He didn't even care to do any surgery to fix his foot. It was just like it was when he was fixed. It hurt, of course, but he didn't mind. He thought he deserved for being stupid enough to think he could save the World…

His scars, like the one on his face and backs were also there, he didn't perform any surgery that wasn't required for him to live.

The only thing he needed to live was L… That sounded tacky but it was true…

They were working together every time now. Sometimes one worked in a case, the other in another. Watari went like a crazy trying to accomplish both necessities.

At nights, they always slept together, in the same bed; there was not a sexual relationship between them, of any kind. Their romantic relationship was basically a small kiss between each other in time to time, every night when they went to sleep, and when they were in bed, Raito always slept in L's arms.

Of course that only happened when they didn't have a case. Otherwise they would stay awake until they solved it. Raito had got L's habit of didn't sleep. And the other had gotten his of actually sleep sometime.

He noticed L's worries about him. He thought it was probably good, because he himself noticed sometimes he forgot to take care of himself, of important things. Of course it was Watari who did most the job of taking care of both of them.

But he knew he loved L, and that L loved him.

…And that Watari loved both as a father.

He had a family now, a new family. It made Raito feel happy and made L feel like he never felt, because he never had a family.

So was good. He was going to be good… both of them.

Happiness was on his way.

…their way…

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_The End!__ (now it's true!)_

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**Pinku: **sooo?? What do you think? It took me a long time, and I had no idea it would end here, but I had the idea today… and I knew it would be finished soon… I thought it was very cute… (fluffy and torture, perfect couple don't ya think?) so what have you thought? Review and tell me, please!!! (big puppy dog eyes)


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